The moment the brownie touched my lips, the chatter and giggles in the school lunch room faded into the ceiling tiles. Faces disappeared and the room filled with white fluffy clouds. Sirens sang and strummed their harps. I was in my happy place, where bunnies hopped and birds chirped. Yes, I'm being serious. Brownies did that to me.
I still remember the feeling of relief chewing gave me. For the first time that day, I didn't care that I sat alone-I had my brownie and that was enough.
Don't feel sorry for me. I used to appreciate sympathy for not being popular; but really, it's how my passion for food started. I should thank those skinny girls that I didn't talk to. From them, I understood that food-in all of its comfort-is always there for me with no expectation to impress. Food, brownies in particular, still make me feel good about myself-inducing a moment of ecstasy on my palate. They take me to that magical place where I'm soaring through the sky and bouncing on clouds. (And I'm not talking about those brownies you'd eat at a party. I don't need them-chocolate is enough to do that to me.) Food is a passion and no longer a way to avoid the unfriendly.
Today, I ate a brownie at the work lunch table. I caught myself glancing right and left. But these days my paranoia takes aim at something different: I do not like sharing brownies. I've learned how to contain my brownie ecstasy to a blank stare, so no one will be curious and ask for a bite. Some days I save my brownie for when nobody is around. That way there is no risk of being asked to tear off 'just a little piece.' Maybe I'm selfish, but at least I know my boundaries.
I live 1500 miles away from my mother. If I'm lucky enough when I come for a visit, these brownies are sitting on her kitchen counter, waiting for their best friend. I think they're magical in many ways. When my mother and I agree on nothing else, these brownies sooth our misunderstandings; reminding us that while we all have our own opinions, we are still connected as human beings-even if it is only by a brownie. One taste and I'm reminded that everything will be OK.
Best Brownies- from Hershey's Classic Recipes
- 1/2 cup butter, melted
- 1 cup sugar
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 2 eggs
- 1/2 cup all-purpose flour
- 1/3 cup Hershey's Cocoa
- 1/4 teaspoon baking powder
- 1/4 teaspoon salt
- 1 batch of Creamy Brownie Frosting
Heat oven to 350 degrees F. Grease 9 inch square baking pan. In one bowel, stir butter, sugar and vanilla. Then beat in eggs, one at a time-set aside. In another bowel, stir flour, cocoa, baking powder and salt. Once blended, combine with butter/sugar mixture. Spread into prepared pan. Bake for 20-25 minutes or until edges separate from pan. Cool and then spread with frosting.
Creamy Brownie Frosting
- 3 tablespoons butter, softened
- 3 tablespoons Hershey's Cocoa
- 1 tablespoon honey
- 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1 cup powdered sugar
- 1-2 tablespoons milk
While brownies bake, prepare frosting. Beat together butter, cocoa, honey and vanilla. Gradually add powdered sugar and milk (add more of less milk for desired thickness). Blend well and top brownies once cooled.
These brownies are my treasure at the end of the rainbow. If I found a pot of gold I'd be happy, but a little frustrated that it took the place of these brownies.
